TIME PLEASE! – 25th, 26th, 27th September 8pm – The Crown Inn

Threadbare Theatre Company are very proud to bring the It’s not us Theatre Company to the Crown Inn, Old Oxted for their production of Time Please!

25th, 26th, 27th September 8pm, Food served from 6:30pm

Don’t miss your chance to see this acclaimed production transferring from Brighton Fringe, in our very own intimate upstairs bar of the Crown Inn, glass of something in hand, and just a short trip home at the end of the night. Why go to London for great theatre?

Tickets available by clicking below or calling 01883 723 855

Time Please, which has launched to rave reviews, sees Cath and Steve struggling to make ends meet in their end-of nowhere pub. Closing time takes a sinister turn when Keith, one of their regulars, arrives – off his head and with a planet-sized chip on his shoulder. Chock full of wild conspiracy theories, Keith wants his story heard and Cath and Steve find themselves caught up in his crack-pot plan…in a lock-in like no other!

Time Please

‘Unexpected, powerful, brilliant, surprising and moving. 10/10,’ Doon Mackichan (Smack the Pony, Plebs, Knowing Me Knowing You)

‘The writing is fabulously blackly comic and timed to perfection,’ Deirdre O’Halloran, Literary Associate, Soho Theatre

‘VERY F*****G GOOD!’ Francis Mcgee (Game of Thrones, Ripper Street, Layer Cake)

‘Funny, thoughtful and deceptively deep.’ Audience Member The Bee’s Mouth Brighton.

‘The bastard child of ‘Dog Day Afternoon… A must see’ – Rachel Mount

‘Bleak as…but, utterly fabulous and captivating’. Andrew Kotting artist and film-maker

‘A fast-paced, wise-cracking, full-on thriller of a show.’ Audience Member St Leonards pub.

*** PLEASE NOTE The play contains strong language and threats of violence and use of a blank-firing gun.***

Time Please runs at 70 minutes with no interval. It will be performed in the upstairs bar of the Crown. As with all performances table preference will be given to those choosing to eat before the performance and then on a first booked first reserved basis. This is a fabulously intimate, up close theatrical experience.​​

Playwriting competition launched


Our sister company Threadbare Theatre Company launch a playwriting competition to find a brand new piece of writing just for us! Shucks guys… thanks!!

“The Local”! A play set in a local pub.

We love working on new writing and on plays that fit our space perfectly. We are now launching a playwriting competition to find a brand new play that we will stage in the upstairs bar of The Crown Inn, Oxted.

We are accepting scripts for production in our Autumn 2017/2018 season on the theme “The local”. The play will be performed in the upstairs bar of the pub and so must not have a large, complicated set (other than the bar itself which can be used within the performance).

So get down your local and start writing!


The competition is open to anyone.

We are happy to receive scripts from 30 mins – 2 hours as if we find 2 good shorter plays we will combine them into one evenings entertainment.

What to submit:

  • A brief synopsis
  • A short insight into your inspiration. Where did your idea come from?
  • At least one scene (we will accept full or partially complete scripts)
  • Character/Casting breakdown – Maximum 3 actors

How to apply:
Please email scripts to

Deadline: 16th June 2017

Other useful information

There is no fee to submit scripts.

We will reply to every script that is submitted but cannot guarantee to give detailed feedback and won’t enter into any further correspondence if your script is unsuccessful.

The winning play will be produced by Threadbare Theatre Company and performed at The Crown Inn, Old Oxted and will be directed by Artistic Director Lucy Linger. The writer will receive an equal share of the profits with Lucy and the actors. All up front production and venue costs will be covered by Threadbare Theatre.

We are committed to producing theatre from anyone and everyone with a great story to tell and a yearning to tell it.

All work submitted remains the intellectual property of the writer. The work must be that of the writer or writers and the writer must own all relevant rights to material included.

New Production: Such Art, Such Beauty by Graham Billing – 26th-29th June

Threadbare Theatre Company are proud to announce the latest production of Such Art, Such Beauty – Written by Graham Billing, Directed by Lucy Linger and starring Carla Fraser, Marie Blount & Ruth Redman.

Sunday 26th June – Wednesday 29th June 2016 at 8pm. Doors open at 6.30pm – Why not book a table and have some food before the performance?


The Crown Inn, Old Oxted RH8 9LN

Tickets: £15.00, £12.50 concessions


Book tickets online Here 

Box Office: 01883 723855

Previous praise for Threadbare Theatre’s production of Such Art, Such Beauty:

“A real hoot from start to finish” – Camden New Journal

“Both funny and thought provoking” – What’s on stage

“A funny and indubitably well-made evening of operativ fancy” – Time Out

First World War Plays…A Music Hall Extravaganza

Threadbare Theatre Company are excited to announce their latest production, an evening of 3 First World War plays lost for 100 years.

Book your tickets now as there are only 4 nights available to see this unique production.

8th – 11th November 2015 at The Crown Inn, 53 High Street, Old Oxted, RH8 9LN

Tickets £15.00 each or £12.50 for concessions

Ticket hotline 01883 723855

Click on the picture below for a larger version.

FWW Poster A3 v2